This was an exploration of something I hadn't really thought of before a few months ago. I used to think of submissiveness and masochism as two sides of the same coin. I have come to realize lately that there really is a difference - you can be a submissive without being a masochist, it just isn't always easy. But this was a very serious look at the reverse - can you be a masochist without being a submissive? Dana wasn't sure but I think in the end she found the answer she was looking for as well a whole side of her personality she hadn't explored before.It took me a while to really find my way through this.I have to be honest. I didn't like Zachary at first at all. If the story had been about his relationship with Bethany I never would have finished it - too many of the things he described pushed all my buttons - in just the wrong way. And actually I wasn't a big fan of Garret either - punishing someone for using their safeword to me is much worse than not having one at all. I think it was the pool scene that finally got me to calm down. When it was just about sensory deprivation and he didn't try to drown her, I finally decided their relationship might have a future.I got to the end of the weekend and didn't see where we were going at all. I have to say I really enjoyed the second half. I really liked Brent, Jacob and especially Max. And by the end, I actually found myself liking Zach although he still has a ways to go for me.There is some real emotion in this book. I was prepared for the ending but the infirmary scene really caught me off guard with the emotional impact evoked.Early on, I was having mixed emotions about the sequel. Now I am looking forward to it.